If you were a fly on the wall at my house, you'd be sure to hear your share of fussing, complaining and whining. Maybe even a slammed door or two.

But enough about me.

In the pressure cooker that's parenting, I have exploded more than once. And it's harder to clean up than spaghetti night with a toddler.

So after years spent indulging in fruitless self-flogging, I finally let go of my obsession with getting it all 'just right.' I confess...I'm not a perfect parent.

Whew. That felt good.

Now, when my son saunters in with his 42nd tardy of the school year, I let it go. When I hear myself hollering "Whatever!" at my teenage daughter, I move on.

Having it all together is overrated anyway.

And I've determined not to waste God's grace. I'll never get it just right. You won't, either. So read on, sister. If you see a little of yourself in me, I hope it helps to know that you're not alone. Nope. If you're a mom, face it. You're never, ever alone.

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Tuesday, April 26, 2011

What's the Big, Honkin' Deal?

I am so excited to have my very good friend Dina guest posting today. Dina is not a blogger, but she should be. And I think she's about thisclose to taking the plunge. Dina and I met about 9 years ago and have spent many hours solving the world's problems in our kids' school parking lot. Which, by the way, is the setting of a funny, entirely all-too-relatable experience she's sharing with us today:

My anger can be an ugly thing. Especially when it’s on display in my children’s Christian school parking lot. At least it wasn’t directed at any family members this time (I’m hoping that’s a step in the right direction). Perhaps I’m just in a bit of denial.

Okay, let me explain. On a recent morning, after dropping my kids off at school, I was exiting the parking lot. You can only turn right or left out of the parking lot into a 15mph school zone. There was quite a bit of traffic coming both directions so I knew – okay , I thought - I had a minute to look down and dial a number on my phone. (Talking while driving is a topic to be discussed at another time.) Well, apparently I missed a prime opportunity to pull out because the person in line behind me gave me a nice long honk. Point taken. Phone down. Begin exit from parking lot.

But wait, I can’t pull out – too much traffic is still coming. Not to mention I’m totally distracted now because the honking has continued very obnoxiously and as I look in the rear-view mirror I see that this man’s lips are moving violently. He's alone in the car, so I realize that he is honking and yelling at me. My first instinct was to throw the car in park, make him wait even longer and go back there and give him a piece of my mind. I didn’t want to be rude to the other people behind him though. Instead, I waited until I had a nice long break in traffic, pulled out ever so slowly, rolled down my window, craned my neck, made full eye contact, and proceeded to scream at the top of my lungs, “THIS IS A CHRISTIAN SCHOOL – YOU COULD ACT LIKE IT!!!”

At least I didn’t swear.

Fast forward to the next day. God must have wanted to test me because as I was coming to school guess who pulled out right in front of me? You guessed it - Mr. Horn Honker! I could feel the anger rising up in me again. I indulged my impulse to ride up on his tail for a minute, until my level-headed daughter reminded me that "I am a Christian and should probably act like one." Ahem.

I know that I should have ignored this man to begin with. I know it was wrong to yell out the window at him. But this type of thing gets to me. I was burning with rage and continued to stew over it for at least an hour. I could have made a list: “40 Ways to Torture the Honking Hellian”.

However, I decided to spend a little time with God, ask forgiveness, and get my head back on straight. Proverbs 29:11 reminded me “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control”. I might tape this to my visor. Maybe the next time I’m confronted by another hostile honker, I won’t act like a fool.
Melinda

8 comments:

  1. Love, love love it. She should definitely start blogging!!

    On another note, somehow I know the next time I want to give someone a piece of my mind (or an earful of horn) I'll be thinking about this post. ;-)

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  2. We've all been there at one time or another. Glad you pulled yourself together for the next go-around. Yeah! :O)

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  3. I could really identify with this and yes you should be a blogger. You have the voice for it!!

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  4. LOOOOOOVE it! I def. have anger issues (I think I inherited it--just saying)....and I loved reading this post!!

    I will def. be saying this verse SEVERAL times when I'm in a situation that brings anger!! I might have to have it tattooed on my arm!

    And just so you know--I also have road rage! So I've been there--and had that honkin' deal! Thanks for being honest and sharing:) BLESSINGS!

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  5. Oh, how our children keep us in line!! I say Dina should jump into the blogging pool, too.

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  6. oh, make a sticker and send me one for my visor, too!

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  7. Ouch... Point taken... When you make up these stickers you should send me one. I don't drive but I have the worst passenger road rage you've ever seen.

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  8. Ok, LOVE the honking crazy man ... and good for you showing him up :)

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Now it's your turn to "Come Clean"! Tell me what you think! I love to hear from you!

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